Productive

January 9th, 2018

Interesting thing: the other day, I was feeling the work I’m doing in school was lifeless and autonomous. I know it’s going in a great direction, but I was honestly feeling I had no particular joy out of it. I was going through the motions and was momentarily confused about what the end goal was. I started filling up my time with more educational pursuits: freecodecamp.org, studying Spanish, studying how to play the guitar, etc. None of it is fulfilling to the heart, but satisfying to the mind. Like eating healthy food you don’t necessarily care for, you know it’s good for you, but ‘meh’.

For a moment, it was all lifeless until I focused on that project I haven’t mentioned. I’m building something and that ‘spark’ — a purpose — revitalized me.

I won’t make the mistakes of the past: thinking a project can replace the progress in academics.

Regarding this project, it’s going to be bookmark in history. Having said that, I really have to start ‘wanting’ to talk to people because I’ll need to in order for this to work. In the meantime, I’m constructing. How am I paying for it while not working? Sigh … I depleted the Apple 401(k). It’s a risk worth taking. I’m planning and narrowing my vision to whats necessary to spend on production correctly. 

This thing — I will succeed in.